LOL…Well, if you are pregnant, this blog is to give you today’s dose of laughter. Hope you find it too relatable, and go ROFL. Oops! I forgot you can’t do that now.
Did you expect to see a mom with glowing skin in the mirror, straight outta magazine cover; but are disappointed that you look like a hot air balloon?
Darling stop worrying! Real life can’t be photoshopped.
Your dark circles are totally valid, when insomnia is part of your pregnancy. You realize you cannot sleep like a baby, when you are expecting one. In fact, you would prefer to sleep like the dad instead.
And every time you are about to shut your eyes, your bladder has other ideas. They would be the only productive part of your body all day.
Waking up becomes difficult at another level and you feel like an upside down turtle. The struggle is real!
The first term is one long all day hangover. The only thing you indulged the night before would be Netflix with a tub of ice cream. You would have thought pregnancy is beautiful until your morning sickness proves otherwise and the crap lasts all day.
The second trimester is when you move on to the Aww…baby is kicking phase from being sick and tired. Well, wait till you pass into the ‘can anyone get this baby outta me’ phase. There is no room for your internal organs anymore and your bladder is the only one that reacts to the growing baby.
You would yearn to relive the days when you could even see your feet, let alone touch them. That’s how you know you are in your third trimester. It’s that term where what pant you wear doesn’t concern you anymore and so does not wearing one. Moreover, things you drop now are lost to you and you say ‘screw it’ and walk away. Those who disagree, are definitely lying. This trimester brings in mood swings like tsunami waves and you just can’t wait to give birth anymore.
They say pregnancy lasts 36 weeks, but you are already sure it’s been 1985 days. So when someone asks if you are still pregnant, you are like,
It’s like waiting for someone at the airport, except you have no idea who you are waiting for and when is the arrival. Moreover, as the end nears, your sarcasm level hits the peak.
Your insatiable appetite has already turned your baby into an over achiever. And the initial weeks just makes it awkward ; you can’t even say if you are actually pregnant or it’s all just fat. Not sure if you are eating for two or an army? You are just one of the many; join the club!
Oh the first few weeks you have the internal war whether you can’t eat because of nausea or you are nauseous because you can’t eat. And once you reach the second trimester, your belly demands more, and your cravings make your taste go…. never mind let’s not get into the weird choices you make. But I am sure you could even enjoy Rachael Greene’s thanksgiving trifle.
The last trimester just makes things easy for you because that’s when you discover that your belly serves multipurpose.
When you are pregnant– you are tired, you realize the next day will be the same; and this is gonna last for 9 months and finally you just decide you want to be the dad next time!
