There are two kinds of first-timers when it comes to having sex. You either waited until after marriage to make it special and you are ready to get pregnant too. Or, you are just feeling the excitement and nervousness with a hint of caution to not get pregnant.
Either way, you would be wondering the same thing, ‘What to expect with first-time sex and pregnancy?’.
Let us break it down for you. Read on to find out what you should know while having first-time sex and what to expect. Discover essential insights, some expert tips and answers to some of the most frequently encountered doubts. Let’s also delve deeper to know its correlation with pregnancy.
Things to Know About First-time Sex
All sexologists unanimously preach one thing, ‘There is nothing called perfect sex’. So, if you are ready to experience this beautiful form of intimacy for the first time or you are wondering about it, know that everyone has very different experiences and you should not pay heed to the right or wrong way of doing things. Instead, focus on exploring what feels good and real for you.
If you are expecting to have well-choreographed sex, allow me to burst your bubble. It may not nearly be as perfect as the ones in rom-coms or as steamy as shown in porn. So instead of trying to make it perfect, lean in and enjoy the whole process – the passionate, funny, and awkward moments, all of them. Have a memorable sex debut.
What Happens to Your Body During First-time Sex?
During first-time sex, various physiological changes occur in the intimate organs. Your vaginal walls and entrance become more relaxed due to increased blood flow and natural lubrication. This allows for easier penetration and minimises discomfort. Additionally, the Bartholin’s glands may secrete more lubrication, further facilitating the process.
Most women are born with a hymen, which is a thin membrane near the vaginal opening. The first-time sex may cause the hymen to stretch and tear and so do other activities like strenuous exercises, resulting in slight bleeding and discomfort for some individuals.
Emotionally, the brain releases hormones like oxytocin, promoting bonding and intimacy with your partner. When you experience a rapturous orgasm, endorphins are released that contribute to the feeling of pleasure and relaxation. After intercourse, the body returns to its normal state.
Can First-time Sex Lead to Pregnancy?
Pregnancy happens when sperm is injected into the vagina from the ejaculate or pre-ejaculate during sex. Sperm can survive inside the female reproductive tract for up to 5-6 days, waiting for an egg to be released during ovulation. If sperm encounters a mature egg and fertilises it, pregnancy begins. You then have to wait for the embryo to successfully implant in the uterus and develop.
If you are using contraceptives like condoms, pills, intrauterine devices, or reversible surgeries, they prevent the sperm from reaching the egg. Consistently using them maximises their effectiveness in birth control.
The chances of pregnancy depend on multiple factors such as the quality of egg and sperm, your age, metabolic disorders, etc., but primarily the time of menstrual cycle and the use of contraception. According to a study, there is a 30% chance of pregnancy when a couple has unprotected sex for the first time. Understanding these will help avoid unplanned/accidental pregnancies and tip the odds in your favour when you are trying to conceive. But too many factors have to align for pregnancy to happen, which is not guaranteed the first time anyone has sex.
So whether it is first-time sex or the 100th time, unprotected sex during the fertile window runs the risk of becoming pregnant.
Frequently Asked Questions About First-time Sex
1. Is First-time Sex Painful?
Most of the anxiety around first-time sex revolves around the fear of pain. The experience varies greatly from person to person and is influenced by various factors like emotional readiness, lubrication, and communication.
You might have slight pain and discomfort caused by the stretch or tear of the hymen. The unusual experience can cause discomfort or short-term pain due to friction which can be overcome by engaging in foreplay or using lubricants.
However, if you have long-term pain, persisting pain even after multiple times, burning sensation or itching in the vagina, reach out to your doctor.
2. Will I Bleed the First Time I Have Sex?
The telltale sign of bleeding after first-time sex has turned out to be a myth. It is possible but not universal. Some people bleed, which is caused by the stretch or tear of the hymen membrane. However, more than 50% of people don’t bleed after first-time sex because the hymen can stretch during regular, non-sexual activities like exercising or tampon use. Factors like arousal, lubrication, and gentleness during penetration can influence the likelihood of bleeding.
3. Will I Have an Orgasm?
It is not guaranteed that every woman will experience an orgasm, everytime they have sex let alone your first time. Orgasm is a complex and individualised response influenced by various factors such as emotional connection, physical stimulation, comfort, and level of arousal. Some women may have an orgasm during their first sexual experience, while others may not.
But for those of you who would like to reach climax, try including clitoris stimulation during sex which has statistically proven to show increased chances of orgasm in women than penetrative sex alone.
4. Does It Count as First-time Sex Only if It Was Penetrative?
Sex is a broad term which is not constrained to nor is synonymous with penetrative sex. But it is often considered so and the misconception is rooted in societal constructs.
Sex is an experience for yourself and your body allowing you to get intimate with yourself or your partner. Anything that gives you pleasure and involves your intimate organs like the vulva, clitoris, vagina, and anus could constitute sex. So doing the deed could mean more than just a penis inside the vagina and encompasses many more ways.
Tips That Help During First-time Sex and Forever
- The act starts way before you enter the bedroom. Keep yourself and your partner comfortable and relaxed.
- Consent is a clear and enthusiastic yes, not just at the beginning, but during and till the end. It is okay to change your mind in the middle or stop at a level and the same applies to understanding your partner’s consent as well.
- Be realistic about your expectations and be open about them. Good communication is the key to enhancing your experience. If you are worried about whether it might hurt, communicate that with your partner as well and ask him to take it slow and be gentle.
- Be prepared. It is a good idea to keep lubes and condoms handy if you are planning to have sex.
- Touch, kiss, and engage in various foreplay activities before engaging in penetrative sex. This will help you get in the mood and allow your body some time to lubricate and prepare for the next step.
- Safety first. If you do not intend to get pregnant, use condoms to reduce the risk of sexually transmitted diseases and avoid accidental pregnancies. The pull-out method is highly unreliable and there is still pre-ejaculation to consider which might even favour pregnancy.
- Pee after sex to prevent urinary tract infections. It helps flush out bacteria that may have entered the urethra during intercourse, reducing the risk of infection.
If you have been building up about sex in your mind to be a momentous, life-changing event, your first-time sex may not surmount your expectations. As fascinating as sex is, it is a skill which gets better with time. Exploring first-time sex and its potential correlation with pregnancy has provided valuable insights into a deeply personal experience.
Remember everyone’s experience is different and communication, trust, and consent are vital for a positive encounter. Embrace your experience with knowledge and open-mindedness and let it pave the way for fulfilling experiences in the future.